I had a lot of time over the weekend to think. To think about nothing, to think about life, family, prostate cancer, the usual. I spent the weekend away from Mary and Brad with my brother Doug, brother-in-law Rich, and a few other friends, as they deer hunted.

I don’t hunt, so I just hung out around the cabin, finished a book, chopped wood, watched a few movies and listened to them discuss “would of, could of, should of”. As I write this, it’s Sunday morning. No one has gotten the big buck yet.

I look out the windows across the back of the cabin, I view the beauty of north central Missouri and I wonder what is next for me? When will it come? How will I react? After a few minutes the thought passes.

Next Sunday will mark thirty-three months. So much has changed, one thing remains constant; I have a terminal disease that may one day take my life. Even after this long, as I write these words, I am still stopped in my tracks. Again, the pause is brief, I go on, I must go on.

Today is one-one, one-one; November 11^th. My grandmother would have been 102 today.

However, today my thoughts wander to one person in a big world, making a difference? I am just one person, in a big world, trying in little ways to make a difference. I suppose I am, I wish I could do more, that is not to say I am not proud of what has been accomplished to date.

That is it, not one thought, just one man in one big world.

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Foods I love;

– Salmon, grilled on a cedar plank with a glaze made from olive oil, brown sugar, thyme and cayenne pepper.

– White chili – prefer chicken to turkey. The more spice, the better. Served with Mary’s corn bread.

– My smoothie – even after 500 of these, every Monday thru Friday for 33 months.

– Mary’s red sauce with roasted tomatoes and garlic on any pasta noodle.

– A crisp, fresh pear

A new favorite song……..

I’m just sittin’ out here,

Watchin’ airplanes,

Wonderin’ which one,

You might be on?